Invisible Abuez: When elderly people suffer a harsh appeal

Aging and illness of elderly parents often fundamentally change the life of adult children. They have to take care of his father or mother, often sacrifice work and personal plans, take time from their children

Gale Bruer de l’Université du Centre Lancashir et Colin Handrey de l’Université de Leeds a rapporté sur l’étude avec la participation de 71 femmes sexuellement actives âgées de 18 à 38 ans. Ses résultats ont été viagra femme dans la revue “Archives du comportement sexuel”. Toutes les femmes étaient méticuleusement et avec des prédilections interrogées sur leur comportement au lit (en général, des scientifiques disent au revoir à ce que des mortels simples seraient appelés pervers pendant une longue période).

and friends. Not everyone gets to cope with the situation.

“She often gets up in the middle of the night, turns on the light in all rooms, wanders and loudly calls her older sister, who has been gone for a long time, I wake up and cannot fall asleep until the morning,” says 57-year-old Marina. Her mother is 84 years old, the last couple of years she has been progressing dementia. An elderly woman seems to be defiantly torn by the wearing diapers and goes under herself everywhere, then in bed, then in the corridor. And also hides the rest of the food in the lower side of the sideboard. When Marina throws out dried crusts, complains to her son, who comes to visit her that her daughter is hunger.

“It is unbearable! It sometimes seems to me that she does it on purpose to angry me. I can sometimes yell at her, scold or even hit in my hearts, and then I don’t find places for myself, ”Marina admits.

Such stories from adult children who take care of aging parents, you can hear many. And most of them cannot be attributed to people with mental disorders, which are characterized by irrational outbreaks of rage and inadequate behavior.

What forces sons and daughters to behave rudely, humiliate, cause pain to parents who are helpless as children and cannot stand up for themselves in a situation of insults, beatings, restrictions on food or, for example, deprivation of finances? Where did they get so much hatred?

When the forces end

“A complex topic is a hate in leaving,” notes the psychiatrist and psychotherapist Grigory Gorshunin. – Those who are careful and those to whom they try to help suffer from this. This is the topic awkward, because people who break down on their guardians are often experienced later by shame and guilt. Usually hatred here is an extreme degree of fatigue, and often the failure of the disease of a loved one. Why does fatigue arise?

The most common reasons:

an attempt to care for without a resource and structure;

an increase in the sensation of “forces” and “hopelessness” in caring for the patient;

The inability to organize adequate medical care from the very beginning of the patient’s behavior or denial of the benefit of such assistance ”.

Even if an elderly person does not immediately lose intelligence and legal capacity, age -related changes make themselves felt: memory, attention and self -control worsen, the ability to make decisions and take care of himself, as before. He sometimes forgets to turn off the gas, cannot send a message, opens the door to scammers and does not see glasses lying at hand.

To strong fear for the life of a loved one in children, many new responsibilities and anxiety for career prospects are added, which lose certainty

What can we say about families where you have to care for lying patients and people with severe dementia. The result of physical and mental overloads – emotional burnout, atmosphere of mutual hatred, resentment and despair.

“In the environment of fatigue and hopelessness, old grievances and hostility are activated,” explains Grigory Gorshunin. – Usually this is bilateral in nature and the elderly respond to the angry caring of the same. The spiral of moral violence can be spinning to the physical, and it also is quite often mutual. Although, of course, lying and seriously ill patients cannot give change “.